Charismatic young man remembered

Daniel Dolmer, 20, died in hospital after being struck by a car Saturday

• Makeshift memorial marks scene of crash
• http://www.thespec.com/news/local/article/537043--charismatic-young-man-remembered

For the family of Daniel Abdolalian-Dolmer, it’s almost impossible to imagine someone so strong, so charismatic, so full of life is gone.
The 20-year-old died May 7 after being struck by a car on James Street South at Charlton Avenue. He was travelling through the intersection on his longboard when he lost his footing. By the time he ran back to grab his board and continue through the intersection, the light changed and he was struck.
“It’s so hard to think that he could get hurt, because he was so physically strong, agile, athletic,” said stepfather Allan Dolmer, whom Daniel also called Dad.
He would ride his longboard to work, where he was an apprentice bricklayer, and even as far as Grimsby or Burlington. He’d run the Wentworth stairs and had a seemingly unlimited supply of energy.
A dynamic personality, friendly, loyal, forgiving, protective and completely void of discrimination are just some of the words the family used to describe Daniel. He was so charming you could never stay mad at him, agreed Allan and Daniel’s older sister Trish Dolmer.
He loved his friends, video games, going fishing — Allan recalls one trip where he caught 189 fish and declared his accomplishment by writing the number with his finger in the road dust on the side of the car.
During a memorial service a little more than a week ago, three people came up to Allan and introduced themselves as his best friend. “Not just friend, but best friend. I don’t know how you do that,” he said.
Daniel’s mom Carmelita was in her native Philippines, where she spends several months each year, when the accident happened. The family left with Daniel’s ashes late last week to meet her in the Philippines where they will lay his remains to rest.
Daniel was about 11 years old and qualified to run in a cross-country race, she remembered in an email shared with The Spectator. The morning of the race — looking for an edge — Daniel decided to borrow a pair of her barely used shoes.
The whole family had a great laugh when Daniel came home and explained how he had a lot of fun, but didn’t do very well. It turns out the shoes were steel-toed.
Daniel spent the last couple years of high school studying in the Philippines, learning the language and culture. One year he beat out hundreds of other classmates to be crowned the winner of a pageant-like competition.
The family has an endless supply of funny stories, including a recent Halloween, when he dressed up as an elf for a party, Allan recalled.
But he showed up to the party too early and had to turn around and come back home. While waiting to go back out he fell asleep — decked out in green — on the couch and missed the entire party, Allan said, adding that it made for a hilarious picture.
Daniel was only a few years old when his biological father Morteza Abdolalian, a native of Iran, separated from his mother. Morteza said he was always struck by his son’s sensitivity and kindness.
“He gave me strength when we were going through the separation,” he said. “He used to say to me, ‘Dad, are you sad?’”
In his life and now particularly in his death, Morteza said Daniel has brought the whole family together.
Now Morteza said he wants to remember his son by writing about his life and perhaps starting a website where other families who have gone through similar things can share. He also wants to encourage other skateboarders and longboarders to wear helmets.
Daniel is also missed by his older brother, Allan (Owen) Dolmer, younger sister, Carmella Dolmer, and many other family and friends in Canada and internationally.
Hamilton police say their accident investigation is ongoing.
noreilly@thespec.com
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